The ultimate car camping guide - [Guest post!]

Mikee and I were huge campers/backpackers before we started our family. We have hiked all over California and our more epic trips include the Inca Trail and the “W” at Patagonia. Since we had kids, we had sadly hung up our hiking boots. At a recent preschool event, I traded summer plan stories with other moms, I was immediately drawn to a mom, Caitlin. She had amazing stories to share about camping, but also seemed to THRIVE on it. As I shared some of my hesitations, she told me she had written a camping with kids manifesto. A mom after my own heart! It’s probably no surprise to you that most of my parenting hacks, I picked up from parents in our village and I’m excited to share this post by guest writer, Caitlin Donhowe. Thank you so much for taking the time to write about your experiences and encouraging us to dust off our boots again! This is long - but it is com.pre.hen.sive!

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Camping à la Donhowe or “I went on my first camping trip ever (six months pregnant with a toddler!) only three years ago, so now I’m obviously an expert!”

Background:

I’m focused on car camping with young children because that’s the only kind of camping I’ve done. Usually we go with a couple of other families, the children run amok, we zone parent, and everyone gets a chance to relax by the fire with a glass of sangria at least a few times. We try to strike a balance between comforts of home and roughing it. Everything fits in our SUV, but our sleeping pads are thick and our food is tasty. This is not backpacking, and the primary goal is to maximize quality time with kids and enjoy ourselves. We are not trying to prove we have outdoorsman cred.

While there are a lot of Amazon links here, much of this stuff was purchased second hand or at cheaper websites. That said, we have totally invested a ton of money in camping equipment, but think of all the Hawaii vacations we haven’t had to pay for because camping is so. much. fun. (The right equipment can absolutely make or break a camping trip.)

I’ve added input I’ve gotten from other camping enthusiasts in italics so it’s clear which points are based on my personal experience and which are not.

Tent:

We are on our third tent. Our first was this one, which was fine but lost favor on a traumatic trip in which the nine month old *needed* to be held and the four year old *needed* to run through the poison oak (not going back to Big Sur with small kids) while my husband and I attempted to set it up. We upgraded to an instant tent which is much bulkier to pack but which goes up in minutes and can be set up solo if necessary. We replaced the tie straps with cinch straps to make it even easier. Eight person was big enough for our queen size bed, a sleeping pad for our son, a pack-n-play for our daughter, a stadium chair for nursing, bags… It was enormous and lovely. It was also sometimes tricky to find a level spot big enough for it, so once we graduated from the pack-n-play we downgraded to the six-person model which is a bit less ridiculous in size. (There are degrees of fast-put-upedness which affect tent size/weight/price. Watch some videos to figure out whether “fast pitch” will suit your needs or whether you want to go for “instant”.)

A note on tent sizing: The number of people the tent is sized for is generally how many will fit, nose to toe, in mummy bags with no room for gear. Most families of four that we camp with have 6 or 8 person tents.

I haven’t totally figured out the tent manufacturers’ marketing, but “cabin” vs. “tent” seems to indicate more vertical sides. This combined with ceiling height is another important spec for us. That awful trip with the nine month old involved a middle of the night need to pace with the baby, and the tent wasn’t tall enough to stand up in beyond the very center.

In addition to a tent, you need an appropriately sized ground cover (some tents come with them but none of ours have). We have this one now. The ground cover (also called a “footprint”) is basically just a tarp that helps protect the bottom of your tent from holes. You want it to match the size of the tent as closely as possible. Too big and water will collect on it and go under your tent. Too small and it’s not actually providing any protection.

Some tents come with rain flys and some do not. Ours did not, and we’ve opted not to buy one because I have zero interest in camping in the rain. In a pinch we could rig up a tarp over our tent. The lack of rainfly doesn’t mean that water can get in, it just means it isn’t *quite* as waterproof as it could be.

Squarely in the “unnecessary luxury” column. We have a tent blanket on the inside of the tent. More protection for the tent floor and a warmer/softer/cleaner surface for walking and falling out of bed. We have a little hand broom and dustpan to keep the inside clean and always leave our shoes on a mat outside. We keep a small stool by the door for putting shoes on and taking shoes off (originally purchased for the kids, but I really appreciate it too).

Depending on where you’re camping (high winds? hard ground?) you might want a mallet and nicer tent pegs.

Sleeping:

The adults have two of these mats which strap together form a queen-size mattress. We put a regular mattress pad, sheets, a couple cotton blankets, and a Pendleton wool blanket on them, and they are just as comfortable as our bed at home. Lots of people use regular air mattresses, but they tend to sleep a bit cold and middle of the night deflation is an issue when there isn’t easy access to power. Our mat “self inflates” most of the way and then you can top it off with a foot pump. It will actually get firmer overnight as your body heat warms the air inside, so don’t overdo it with the inflation. Since buying those mats (which are pricey!) there have been several new ones released that are cheaper and higher rated. It’s worth doing some research here and maybe waiting for REI’s 20% off member sale.

Sleeping bags are slippery and mats tend to be as well. I really like the sheets setup because you can camp on a slight incline (often unavoidable) and not end up on the ground. You can also easily pull a kid into bed with you in the middle of the night if you have to.

Bunk beds

The kids used to sleep in a pack-n-play and on an old Thermarest from my husband’s college days. We recently upgraded to this bunk cot, partly because it’s awesome (a bunk bed!) and partly because we wanted to switch to a smaller tent. An added bonus is that they stay in place rather than rolling off their mat and all over the tent. They have these two sleeping bags, which are not warm enough on the coldest nights without an extra blanket and a couple layers of pajamas.

I sleep with a billion pillows and invested in these (in a variety of colors and sizes) for the whole family so the pillow situation doesn’t look quite as ridiculous. They’re pretty good, but we still bring three normal pillows from home for the most mission-critical pillow roles. (I am a special pillow snowflake. It is what it is.)

Eating:

I try to do as much food prep in advance as possible so I can relax on the trip. I also really try to keep food prep (and any stuff storage) off the picnic table so that that space can be used for eating and playing board/card games. Some campsites have bear boxes with shelves. Some have flat tops. Some have slanted tops. I prefer the shelves. The slanted top is a dealbreaker as I really want that real estate. Some campsites have two picnic tables which is amazing.

We have this camp kitchen, this stove (with this carrying bag), this cooler (which we’ve created dividers for) and these ice packs. We have a second, smaller cooler which fits perfectly inside the larger cooler. (Sadly it has been with my husband longer than I have and is of unknown provenance.) Things that are more easily spoiled or for later in the trip go in the inner cooler which doesn’t contain beverages, is therefore opened much less frequently, and stays colder.

We got a small refillable propane tank with adapter (so we don’t have to use the disposable propane canisters), flexible plastic cutting boards, an egg holder, and a set of knives with sheaths. I originally purchased these marshmallow roasters but switched to these as they require less tetris to fit in the camping tub. We have these pans. The rest of our cooking gear (ladle, tongs, oven mitt, can opener, etc.) is nothing special from Target or estate sales. I do own nearly all the kitchen utensils, etc. in duplicate so that one set can just live in the camping box. It’s less work getting out the door for a trip, and there’s no risk of leaving something behind because we needed it at home up until the last minute.

We use these silicone potholders to keep the camp stove from slipping around and attached rings to our cooking utensils so they can hang off the side of the kitchen. We have a wipeable tablecloth that I sewed adjustable nylon straps and buckles to so I can fasten it below the table. (I can’t find clamps that will go wide enough for the thick picnic tables at campsites.) On a related note, we used this high chair (with tray) when my daughter was small as it’s one of the only ones on the market that opens wide enough.

For a lot of this stuff only one family in your group needs it. Don’t bring two camp kitchens on one trip. :-)

Here’s a list of meal ideas. I’m not a fan of eating peanut butter sandwiches for dinner, so we go a little more elaborate than that. If you like pbj, knock yourself out. You see lots of pictures on Pinterest of food you can cook over the fire that’s totally ill-suited to fire cooking. Don’t try to bake with a campfire unless you have a lot more experience with fire building than I do. We do most of our cooking on the camp stove and limit our fire cooking to grilling hot dogs, warming hobo packets (foil packets of pre-cooked food) and roasting marshmallows. Grilled garlic bread on the campfire is amazing. 

Another parent recommends pie iron cooking as another simple, quick way to make a meal over the campfire.  A pie iron is essentially a sandwich press on a stick. Be sure to grease the pie iron for best results.

I don’t bring raw meat both because leaking juices in the cooler is disastrous and because making sure it’s fully cooked is more fuss than I’m willing to deal with. Pre-grilling marinated chicken strips and then just reheating them on the campfire is much easier. I buy pre-cooked, shelf-stable bacon for things like breakfast sandwiches or scrambles. I make chili ahead and freeze it and then use it as an ice pack in the cooler with a plan to eat it toward the end of the trip.

I’m not a coffee drinker. My husband just uses instant coffee when we camp, but we have friends that swear by cold brew and others who bring bottled cold brew. One friend recommends this instant coffee (“Any Malaysian White coffee from Ipoh would do, but if you can find the "Old Town" brand, that's the most popular.”), available at Ranch 99. There’s also coffee concentrate and a million products for making coffee while camping. Worth doing some Amazon/REI searches if this is something you feel strongly about.

Dishes:

We originally bought this set of dishware, but cutting on the plastic plates scratches them, grease seemed to cling to them, and the fabric cozies on the glasses were hard to keep clean. We’ve switched to plain enamelware plates and bowls even though they don’t nest in the same satisfying way, these tumblers for warm drinks (different colors for different family members, larger for the adults, smaller for the kids) with the no moving parts lid, and these glasses for cold drinks. We use a cheap flatware set from Target and have one extra plate and fork for serving food.

We got a cheap dish pan set from Ranch 99 that we use for washing dishes. Hot water from the kettle in one pan, cold water for rinsing in the next, and the dish drainer lives under the camp kitchen so things can dry. We use this dish soap. Special soap matters because the normal stuff will kill plants when you dump it.

We have this collapsible water bottle that we keep on the bear box and use both for handwashing and for filling dish pans, kettles, etc. We keep a bottle of hand sanitizer and a box of wipes next to it.

Fire:

We generally pre-chop kindling but buy the rest of the firewood at the campsite. (Note that some parks don’t allow outside wood.) The wood is a few dollars more expensive at the park, but we’re pretty tight on space. We also bring a hatchet & mallet (if we haven’t made kindling) tongs, fire starters, a lighter/matches, and bellows. These color pellets are kind of cool but can’t be used while cooking food. This is our favorite grill scraper.

We prefer the hearth style campfire spots for cooking and child safety (harder to tumble into) but the round metal ring style for sitting around and roasting marshmallows. Often campgrounds have both kinds and you have to pay attention when you’re booking to get the one you want. We’ve found the holy grail of good adjacent campsites with one of each at a couple campgrounds.

Light:

We have one lantern that we hang from the tent ceiling with a carabiner, a headlamp, and a flashlight. Those are all USB-rechargeable. We have two of these power banks for keeping phones and lights charged. We also sometimes do glowsticks for fun, and if they’re old enough to be playing after dark, flashing or glowing wearables are nice to help keep track of them.

Chairs:

We have these chairs and these two for the kids. We have this umbrella which clamps onto the chairs. We’ve done multiple rounds of iteration on chairs. One was too long and too heavy. Another had cup holders that were too small. We tried to balance cost, quick-drying material (often lots of dew in the morning), weight, and cup holders big enough to accomodate Camelbaks and Yeti mugs. Another parent recommends this chair with a small attached table.

Packing:

We keep everything in rubbermaid tubs. One tub with all the dedicated camping supplies stays packed year round, we just replace consumables (clean dish towels, paper towels, ziploc bags, garbage bags) after each trip. A second tub holds non-perishables and gets packed the week before. (The food from the tub goes in the bearbox, but we leave the cooler out as there aren’t actually bears in any of the campsites we camp at. Note that there are plenty of squirrels and raccoons who have bear-like aspirations, so take that into account when securing your food.) A cardboard box holds the kindling and fire stuff. Stuff sacks hold pillows and blankets. This roof bag (with non-slip mat) gives us just enough space to fit everything in the RAV4. (We’ve actually purchased a van as of 5/18 in part to make camping easier. Leaving the RAV4 comments to make it clear that you don’t need a huge vehicle to make it work. A good friend of mine camps with her family of four in a tiny two-door sedan, but she makes a lot of sacrifices in comfort that I find unpalatable.)

Random:

The kids love playing (and napping!) in the hammock, which we hang with these straps.

We have a canopy that’s nice to put over the picnic table if the campsite isn’t shady. We try very hard to choose shady campsites.

We have a tarp that can also be rigged up for shade. I’ve heard good things about using ratcheting straps for putting it up, but we haven’t gotten any *yet*.

The kids love scootering while we camp. Now that our oldest can ride a bike we’ll have to decide if it makes sense to bring the bike rack and bikes for the adults. 

Walkie talkies are nice for campgrounds without cell service so you can keep in touch with each other while some are swimming and some napping, etc. Our friends have purchased the same walkie talkies as us and we agree on a channel at the beginning of the trip so that we can all communicate.

A clothesline and pins are nice for campgrounds where there’s a creek or swimming hole. Some campsites have the kind of bear box that must be held closed with something. We usually bring a collection of carabiners in different sizes for things like that.

Extra rope, toilet paper, a swiss army knife, and duct tape are good to have. Some campsites have coin operated showers so bring coins if you like showering. (I don’t really, but don’t let my lack of personal hygiene deter you.) Turkish peshtamal towels dry quickly. 

You can hang your trash and recycling bags up by wrapping the corner around a rock and the sliding the bag between the slats of the picnic table. If you’re really extra you can bring a washer for this purpose so the table cloth still lies flat on the top of the table.

A pair of shoes you can slip on and off effortlessly is critical for not making yourself crazy going in and out of the tent. Sandals will leave you with suuuuuper dirty toes. I like Dansko clogs or Crocs for this. Crocs let some dust in through the holes but can be used for showering and/or creek walking and can be thrown in the washer when you get home. You’ll need a second pair of shoes for hiking around and potentially a third pair of shoes for showering/creek walking if your slip-ons aren’t water friendly. This is why we’re car camping.)

I try to walk around new-to-me campgrounds with a pad and paper and take notes on which campsites I might like to book. Would we need a shade canopy? Are there a couple adjacent nice sites for camping with a group? Where is it relative to the bathroom? What kind of campfire does it have? Is there a steep drop off nearby that might eat kids or balls? How much flat area is there for tents? How close are the neighboring sites? How bikeable is the area around it for kids? I have a Google doc (which I’m not sharing!) with notes about pros and cons of various sites at each campground. Most campgrounds book either one year or six months out, and the best sites do get reserved right away, so we do our planning well in advance. 

Most campgrounds allow eight people per site and some also have rules about the number of tents allowed. The level of enforcement varies (we once camped next to a site at Mount Madonna with twenty-three people and eleven tents on it). I like wooded campsites with plenty of shade, and those tend to only have flat space for two tents. Also I’m a rule follower. We adhere to the eight-person guidelines. 

Some campsites allow dogs and some do not. Those that allow dogs usually allow them at sites but not on trails.

We have lots of friends that aren’t quite up for actual camping but have enjoyed day camping with us. They drive to the campgrounds in the morning, park in the day use area, stay through dinner and marshmallow roasting, and then head home.

We have this wagon for group camping situations like Boy Scouts where we can’t park directly next to the campsite. We also have this table for group camping because the picnic tables are not adjacent to the tent in that scenario. It’s also nice as a coffee table by the campfire.

This shelving unit (strapped to the bunk cot with velcro straps) keeps gear organized in the tent. 

Here is a sample of the packing spreadsheet I use.

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